


A Silent Whisper

by Faded_BlueEyes



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Blood, Fighting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-30
Updated: 2014-04-30
Packaged: 2018-01-21 10:09:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1546919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faded_BlueEyes/pseuds/Faded_BlueEyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren finally makes it to the ocean with a few members of the Survey Corps. He starts thinking about how they finally won and he got to see the ocean for himself, all while clutching the cravat around his neck, tears silently falling while doing so.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Silent Whisper

The waves softly crashed against the beach, their fingers brushing each stone with a gentle caress as the wind ushered them gently fowards. The sun shone off the rippling water, its golden light warped in the twisted waves. Fire erupted where the suns rays touched the water, a golden, passionate lava dancing on the trembling surface. The breeze, by contrast, was cool; it hung in the air, and was subtle yet ever-present, like the breath of a dead lover on your neck. 

This wasn't how this was supposed to end. 

Eren wasn't stupid. He knew winning a war without casualties was a lunatic's dream, but he never realized that some deaths hurt more than others. The loss of life had always been painful; each death that he witnessed was cruelly drilled into his brain, the names constantly on repeat: Carla Jaeger, Thomas Wagner, Mina Carolina, Gunther Schultz, Erd Jinn, Petra Ral, Oluo Bozado, Hannes.

And there are the ones he never saw die, but imagines their deaths to be calm and quick as opposed to bloody and painful: Historia Reiss, Hannah, Sasha Blouse, Daz, Jean Kirstein.

But one name rings above them all. 

A hand clasps his shoulder and he turns, looking straight at Armin. The blond gives him a small smile, his eyes lighting up with the view they're faced with. Behind him, the remains of the Survey Corps set up camp and Hanji starts commanding squads to map the area. Now that they can leave the walls, they will need maps of the whole wide world which they never got to experience before. 

It's over. They won. 

The statement makes Eren's throat tighten and he purses his lips, his head turning to the side and his eyes closing tightly at the thought. This is not a win. 

What does it matter that the titans are gone? Most of the people he wanted to share this opportunity with are dead. 

“Is it as beautiful as you thought it would be?” He asks Armin instead of pondering on the cruel thoughts swirling in his head. 

Armin's hand squeezed his shoulder in comfort. “It's beautiful.” He confirms. “It's breathtaking, even.” He adds after a pause. “But I'm not sure if it was worth it.” 

Eren nods once, taking a step forward and away from Armin. Armin doesn't interrupt him, but instead turns and goes to check on Mikasa's injuries. 

Eren's knees give out by the golden shore, his blood-soaked trousers seeping in the cold liquid and he almost laughs as salty water irritates his cuts. His own salty tears soon join the ocean as his body starts shaking with the effort to hold back the sobs. 

Sasha, who has always been obsessed with food to the point where it would probably lead her to her death and who always made sure to put Jean in his place. 

Historia, who had been the shy, sweet, innocent girl who fought with more passion than he's ever seen. 

Jean, the one Eren never really understood. But he realized now that Jean never meant bad, he was true to himself and who he really was. He was funny, warm and wanted to join the Military Police to avoid the cruel death, he got in the end. At least, he wasn't up there alone. Through his sobs, he managed a weak smile; at least Marco would put Jean in his place about sacrificing himself for the rest of them. 

And then, there was the death that echoed around his head. Eren gripped up and clutched at the cravat tied around his neck. 

_His scream became a titan's roar, furious and wild, as he saw an abnormal grasp at the 3D maneuver gear wires and pull. With the constant stream of incoming titans, it was hard to keep focused, but the only reason which kept him going so long was currently slammed against the tree._

_Levi's body hit the tree with a crunch that Eren was sure he heard from the large distance. He didn't waste time; he slammed the nearest titan into a tree, ripping out its nape and then roared again, hoping to keep the attention off him for some time while the titans reacted and attacked each other._

_He sprinted between the trees, his large body falling to his knees by the Corporal's small figure. He lay just under the tree, with the wires having lowered him to the ground enough. Corporal Levi was the best of them all; but even the best fall._

_He grasped Levi's body as carefully as he could, taking into consideration the broken and battered bones of the man. Levi coughed harshly, blood spewing out of his mouth. How Eren wished he could leave the titan form and hold Levi through the last moments, but it was impossible amidst the battle._

_“Eren...” Levi's voice was weak, a croaky whisper._

_Eren stared at him, with no way to reply, and as he blinked, he realized the water was pooling in his eyes. He didn't know titans could cry. It never happened before._

_“Oi, brat, I need you to promise me something.” Eren gulped at the nickname; but it had stopped being harsh long time ago and was now only a teasing remark. Eren nodded once, his finger carefully lifting up to touch Levi's body one last time, gently smoothing out the wrinkles in his green cloak._

_“That damn ocean. “ Levi chuckled, more blood dribbling down his chin. “You told me so much about it.” His eyes scanned over Eren's titan face, almost thoughtful. He reached out his good hand, stretching slightly and Eren felt him place it on his cheek. As tough as a titan's skin should be, he could feel it all. “Promise you'll see it for me.”_

_Eren knew there was no point arguing. He didn't need to be a doctor to see how fatal Levi's injuries were. So instead, he nodded once._

_Levi closed his eyes then, and smiled softly. It was one of the smiles reserved especially for Eren after a long day; one of the smiles he would see every night while his arms wrapped around Levi's smaller frame. “Good.” He whispered hoarsely. He smiled again, his body shaking with a chuckle. “Guess this is really fucking cliché, but you know I love you, right?”_

_Eren whimpered, more tears falling. “That's good, too.” Levi whispered again, his eyes opening, the soft smile still on his lips. His grey eyes molded into Eren's, taking in the view one last time._

_Eren saw the light leave his eyes. His body went limp. Eren roared._

_Later, as he stood above Levi's body in his human form, he didn't cry. His body was dehydrated at this point with having cried too much for the past few hours._

_He only leaned down and kissed his lover's forehead once, his hand caressing his cheek and his lips whispering one last confession and one last goodbye._

His teal-green eyes looked up into the blue sky, unblemished and empty of clouds. He tugged the cravat off and looked down at it. “It's not fair.” He whispered, staring at the white piece of cloth. 

But life wasn't fair, and he had quickly come to realize that. 

He opened his hand out and let the cool breeze carry the material in the air. He watched as it landed on the trembling surface and disappeared. The same cool breeze tickled at the back of his neck again, _like a silent whisper._

He stood, then, and left.

**Author's Note:**

> All the appreciation goes to [melody-hina](http://melody-hina.tumblr.com/) for coming up with the idea. 
> 
> I just wrote it. 
> 
> God, I actually cried. I'm such a wuss. 
> 
> Thanks for reading and check out my other stories if you want :) My [tumblr](http://surveycorpscastiel.tumblr.com/)


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